


Recovery

by MamaCesa



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Kiss, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-14 08:35:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29789262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MamaCesa/pseuds/MamaCesa
Summary: Derrick moves away from his hometown after a nasty breakup. When he orders pizza, he's surprised that the delivery guy is a blast from the past.
Relationships: Deceit | Janus Sanders & Morality | Patton Sanders
Kudos: 11





	Recovery

**Author's Note:**

> written before Janus' name reveal. Deceit's name is Derrick

So there he was. First night alone in his new apartment, a thousand miles away from his hometown. Standing alone for the first time in two years. Though they felt like mere minutes. The rooms he stood in were foreign, yet they still held the ghosts of joyous laughter he brought in his suitcases. He was alone. 

Derrick chose to pause his sulking. He had time to be independent. He could be his own person. He could navigate adulthood without someone shouting in his ear, or pulling him in a direction not meant for him. On his own, he didn’t have to worry about becoming disoriented at the first sign of betrayal. 

He went to the small kitchenette. The cabinets were small, but he could make do. His budget wouldn’t accommodate much food at first anyways. There was some counter space to work with, which would come in handy for washing dishes by hand. He scowled at the lack of a dishwasher. The stove was electric, which was nice. No worries for a fire. 

He made the decision to order himself a pizza for his first night in, making a mental list of groceries to purchase the next day. He thought of that distractedly as he input his order for the nearest Domino’s. Pocketing his phone, he went to the space soon to become his living room. He sat cross legged on the floor, picking up his book for entertainment. He also added ‘getting wi-fi’ to the list.

He dog eared the page when he heard the knock on the door. It was swift, light, and not too overbearing. He smiled as he opened the door. It was polite at first, until he saw the delivery person’s cheerful grin. 

“Here ya go!” The familiar man exclaimed as he handed Derrick his food. Derrick sat it down on the floor behind him.

“Sorry,” he apologized while searching for his wallet in his jacket pockets, “I’m so disorganized.” 

“No worries,” the delivery guy assured. A spark of recognition lit up in his blue eyes as he accepted the cash. “Hey, have we met before?”

“No, I don’t think so. I just moved here,” Derrick answered. He felt embarrassed, because he also felt the other was familiar. 

“Really? Where from?” 

“Northern Idaho, near Couer d’Alene.” 

The man squealed, “Oh my goodness, me too! I’m Patton Reed, and you are?” 

Suddenly Derrick knew who was standing before him. His old high school crush, the pretty social butterfly who he pined over until right after his senior year when he met…him.

“Derrick,” he responded, feeling slighted at not being recognized, “Derrick de Lion,” 

Patton took a moment to remember the name. He bit his lip in concentration, then he remembered, “Oh, yeah! It was hard to recognize you without the lip piercings.” 

“Yeah, I’m sure,” he responded coldly. “Thank you for the food.”

“Oh sure,” Patton zipped up his delivery bag. “Thank you for ordering, I hope you have a good night!” 

Derrick just nodded as he closed the door. He tried to keep his mind off of the bittersweet memories from high school that snuck in when he opened the door to someone who once held his affection. He chewed his pizza, sat upon the floor, and tried to read his book. 

When he went to sleep, on the air mattress with just a blanket and small pillow, he dreamt of familiar blue eyes underneath brown curls that he learned to memorize over his teenage life. 

—-

Derrick pushed his shopping cart with one hand with his phone in the other. He was trying to calculate the total each time he added a new item to his cart. He didn’t want to end up going over his limited budget buying food and household essentials. 

He bit his lip as he walked. He momentarily lost focus to his surroundings, and bumped into someone’s cart. 

“Oh, sorry,” he quickly said. Then he looked up, and was surprised to see who was standing there.

“Hey there, stranger. No worries,” Patton grinned. Derrick felt a sprinkle of youthful joy in his heart. 

“Shopping for the new house?” Patton asked when Derrick didn’t answer. 

“Yeah, and I’m trying to keep an eye on my budget,” he waved his phone lamely. 

Patton nodded, understanding. “I get it. Need any help? I have today and the next two off if you need someone to help with furniture or anything. I know how rough a new start can be on your own.” 

“Oh,” Derrick remarked, shocked at the bold offer. “No, I think I can handle things on my own.” 

Was that disappointment that flashed across Patton’s face? “I understand. Well, let me give you my number if you need to call me. We could grab lunch sometime, catch up?” 

Derrick didn’t want to say no again, so he opened a new contact page on his phone and handed the phone to the giddy man. 

“Thank you so much! Don’t hesitate to call or text me for anything.” 

Derrick only nodded, wanting to get out quickly. Internally he screamed. Where was that energy when he was younger, when he was still able to carry hope in his bloodstream?

He looked back at the retreating figure, and felt a warmth in his face he couldn’t identify. Was that…a blush?

—

He lounged in the chair at the Starbucks he started to frequent. He lazily looked around the room, waiting for Patton to join him. 

It had been two month since he had moved to the city, and he had started to become acquainted with his only connection to the past. Patton was a gentle reminder. He was the first ray of sunlight through winter clouds that told the world that spring was on its way. 

He shook his head out of that thought. He tried not to bite his lips in nervousness, his snake bite piercings still fresh from being re-pierced. He focused on avoiding the urge to fiddle with the new bits of metal, instead of the idea that he was barely entertaining. 

Patton came up to him, smiling the same friendly smile that once sent Derrick into hours-long daydreams that cost him good grades in math. His old self swooned somewhere inside. 

“Well, hey there! I see you’re going back to a classic, eh?” Patton noticed. 

Derrick chuckled, “Yeah, I figured I’d start getting back on track to being myself.” 

Patton nodded sympathetically. He had recently learned of the person who had sent Derrick so far away in the first place. In fact, it was he who recommended that Derrick do something that he couldn’t do in the old relationship. 

“Well, I love it! You look more like yourself, more,” Patton posed with his shoulder sticking out, “Mysterious.” 

Derrick laughed. “That’s the goal,” he indulged himself in a brief glance into the blue eyes behind the glasses frame. 

Patton took a long sip of his coffee while Derrick just observed him. It was perhaps because he had his piercings again, or maybe it was the cheerful mood, but he looked at Patton and found himself thinking some older, familiar thoughts. A quick flash of a daydream brushed across his eyelids as he blinked. 

For the rest of the conversation Patton remained unaware of the eruption of emotion in Derrick’s body. He was a master at deceiving everyone around him that he was okay. When they walked out of the door to say goodbye, Patton hugged him. For the entirety of the extra warm embrace, he was convinced that maybe putting up a cold front wasn’t worth the protection it promised. 

Then, the hug was over, and he was reminded of why he wasn’t letting anyone close to his heart. The biting cold of the gusting wind around them was a harsh reminder of the empty bed he was returning to. The pain of letting go was too much compared to the pain of loneliness he now endured. 

He watched Patton walk away with his hair being ruffled by the breeze. How was it possible that his figure hadn’t changed since they were in school? What if him being frozen in time was just enough to be a companion to the ice covered heart that threatened to beat with fervor when his gaze lingered too long? What if…what if Derrick could try again with feelings he’d already felt? Rejection that he had already suffered? 

No. It was different. He had enough heartbreak for his lifetime. 

—-

“Oh my God, Derrick, thank you so much for coming over!” Patton greeted as the taller man walked through his front door. 

“Of course, I had so many options of where to go for Christmas this year that I just decided to go where it was closest,” he lied. None of his family wanted him back up there, they had sent him away long before he moved.

“I understand,” Patton told him, giving a look of pity that brought into question how well Derrick was able to lie. 

“Well, I brought you a present,” Derrick pulled out the small box, “It’s not much, but I couldn’t come over empty handed.” 

Patton cooed, “Thanks, pal! Do you want me to open it now or after dinner?” 

“Whichever you’d like,” Derrick blushed. 

Patton ripped open the wrapping with wide eyes reminiscent of a child who got everything on their Christmas wish list. He held the object in his hands, eyes tearing up. 

“I know you’re a fan of the Beatles. So I got you this. It was on sale, so it’s totally no big deal,” Derrick babbled, hoping the other man liked it. 

“It’s a CD of the Beatles’ Greatest Hits! Of course I love it,” Patton pulled Derrick into a surprising hug, and they both let out pure laughter. 

Derrick had grown comfortable with Patton’s warm care in his life. It wasn’t like an unbearable burn like in high school, it was barely a harsh reminder of his lonely heart. He didn’t know until they embraced in that moment, that he melted enough around his friend to feel again.

It was just Patton, so they opted to watch Christmas movies while eating pizza. When they finished watching Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, Patton smiled in a new way that piqued Derrick’s interest. 

“What are you smiling at?” he asked the grinning man. 

“Nothing,” Derrick gave him a pointed look, “Alright, I guess I was just thinking about how this feels a bit like high school,” Patton seemed nervous. 

Derrick was confused. “We didn’t hang out in high school, Patton.” 

“Yeah, I know that,” Patton playfully rolled his eyes, “I meant the pizza, the movies,” he nudged the nervous man with his elbow, “A cute guy next to me.”

Derrick’s eyes widened, “You were into guys in high school?” 

“Well, I mean, I still am,” Patton mumbled, embarrassed. “I didn’t actually date them. I guess I meant this was like a high school fantasy of mine.” 

“Mine too,” Derrick whispered, staring at Patton. A confession nearly made it to the tip of his tongue, but he bit it closed. 

“What do you mean by that, Derrick?” Patton asked. He was staring back, almost as intensely as the other. 

Derrick gulped. The cold was going away. The cover was dropping, his exterior was rapidly falling apart. His heart beat erratically. Was he ready to confess? Confess a truth that only resurfaced after a detrimental heartbreak? 

Derrick felt as if the two years with his ex were merely minutes as he beheld the man next to him. Was the heartbreak merely a lesson from fate? _Don’t stray from the path, Derrick. Choosing anyone else to give affection to is absurd and will freeze you until you learn._

“I had,” Derrick whispered. 

“I have…” Derrick closed his eyes. Patton leaned in closer to hear the whispered confession. 

“I was really in love with you in high school,” the secret spilled over. Derrick opened one eye to peek at Patton. 

Patton was still. There was no response evident in his body. Derrick shut his eyes in disappointment. He stood up, making his way to leave, when Patton also stood to grab his wrist. 

“Don’t leave it there,” Patton begged, “Tell me more.” 

Derrick gulped, acquiescing to the request to sit back down. The only lighting in the room was the television screen and the Christmas lights. Patton’s face was glowing in the literal sense, making Derrick feel more at ease. 

“I used to watch you, all the time,” the truth kept spilling, “Not in a creepy way. I just found you irresistible. I used any chance I could get to speak to you, but I couldn’t approach you. I was scared I’d put you off with my fangs,” he pouted his lip out for emphasis. 

“I got over it, I met…” Derrick paused, “I met Josh. Which turned into a two year long, horrible decision that recently has me questioning if my crush ever…” 

“Went away?” Patton offered with a gentle voice. 

Derrick just nodded. 

“I wish I had known then, cause I had a major crush on you as well,” Patton confessed. “I always found you intriguing, but figured I was too preppy for you.” 

Derrick laughed, “Guess we were both idiots, then.” 

Patton’s smile was wistful as he looked at Derrick, “I’m glad you’re here with me, and not with Josh.” 

Derrick smirked, “Wish I had caught on sooner.” 

“It’s not too late,” Patton whispered, leaning closer with instinct towards his guest. 

The taller man shook his head ruefully, “That time is gone. It is too late, for me. I don’t think I can fall in love again. I’m too far gone.” 

Patton tenderly laid his hand on Derrick’s cheek, and a blush made its way under his fingertips. 

“It’s never too late for love,” he whispered before leaning in for a soft kiss. 

The last bit of ice melted away with the kiss of his companion. His heart beat again, with heat melting away the cold. 

Patton pulled away, noticing Derrick’s non-response. “I’m sor-”

Derrick pulled Patton in by the collar and kissed with so much passion. Years and years of love forced its way between them as they kissed. It was a kiss that had been waiting too many years to exist. Their hands gripped each other close. Patton felt bold enough to take a lip ring between his teeth, eliciting a desperate gasp from the heated man. 

They pulled apart, hair in a mess, gasping for air, and with swollen lips. They stared at each other, wondering to themselves what the next move was. 

“Finally,” they both breathed out before reclaiming each other’s lips.


End file.
